001. (v2) [audio + commentlog/open]
A...Again?
[Xanth lets out a hollow, bitter laugh.]
I... n-no, you, you have to be k--kidding. I-I already d--did this. M-My world was... a-already gone. Th--The End took it. K-K'lai, a-and Grams, they... th-they were... already gone.
[He takes in a shuddering breath. His chest tightens, his voice cracks.]
N--Now you say it... it's all g-gone? Unmade? D--Didn't ev--even-- h-happen? How!? I-- I lived that! It-- it can't-- not again--
[There's a small gasp, like a prelude to a sob, but then Xanth slams the book shut.
Xanth takes his record, takes his key, and immediately sets out into the Keep. He's tired, he's so fucking tired, but he has to know if anyone else got snatched into this mess too.]
[Xanth lets out a hollow, bitter laugh.]
I... n-no, you, you have to be k--kidding. I-I already d--did this. M-My world was... a-already gone. Th--The End took it. K-K'lai, a-and Grams, they... th-they were... already gone.
[He takes in a shuddering breath. His chest tightens, his voice cracks.]
N--Now you say it... it's all g-gone? Unmade? D--Didn't ev--even-- h-happen? How!? I-- I lived that! It-- it can't-- not again--
[There's a small gasp, like a prelude to a sob, but then Xanth slams the book shut.
Xanth takes his record, takes his key, and immediately sets out into the Keep. He's tired, he's so fucking tired, but he has to know if anyone else got snatched into this mess too.]
[Audio] --> [Commentlog]
[Xanth keeps her instructions in mind. He's not sure where the library or the hot springs are, but ten minutes of searching bring him to the place, and the girl, he seeks.
When he sees her, he breaks into a run.]
K-Kairi!
[He looks like the boy Kairi knew before, but so much worse for wear. His shirt is torn and dirty, and his pants are flecked with old bloodstains on the bottom left leg. He's favoring his right leg, too - did she notice the limping step to his run?]
[Commentlog]
She doesn't notice the limp at first. It's the state of him that's caught her attention, the blood and the dirt and the torn clothing. It's only when she looks for injuries to explain the mess that she sees.]
Xanth...!
[She pulls up short, momentarily at a loss for words.]
What happened? What's going on?
[Commentlog]
But he doesn't.
What Xanth does is pull Kairi into a tight hug.]
[Commentlog]
What was that about? She avoids Xanth's gaze for a second and then glances up at him, uncertain what to say.]
... Are you okay?
[Commentlog]
It's now that all those details he missed finally click. Kairi's not disheveled. Kairi's not injured. She's not even disheveled.
And her eyes.
She hasn't had those eyes in weeks.]
Um.
[Xanth steps away from Kairi, recalling Kevas's words: "There are some other familiar faces here, but they aren't from the Elegante."]
I-I-- I'm-- s-sorry.
I-I thought... you were... s-someone I-- I kn-know.
[Commentlog]
[Something was really wrong with him.]
What happened to you? You look-... You're hurt. C'mon. We're going to the infirmary.
[And squashing her misgivings, Kairi goes to walk past him. Maybe he has a concussion. Maybe she's walking straight toward the danger that left him this way. She squashes that feeling too.]
[Commentlog]
[As she goes past him, Xanth reaches out to catch Kairi on the shoulder.
But he can't touch her.
He snatches his hand back.]
Can-- can we just-- talk? For-- f-for a min--minute? P-Please?
[Commentlog]
It seems like there's only one way she's going to get answers.]
Okay.
[And turning back the other way, she walks a couple of steps before sitting. At least this way Xanth's not standing on that hurt leg. She glances back over her shoulder but can't muster a smile. It's all just too weird. So she tries to look reassuring instead. She's not really sure if it works.]
[Commentlog]
Xanth follows her lead and takes a seat a few feet away from her. For a few seconds, he just looks at her. His expression, though he doesn't realize it, is a mixture of longing and sadness.
He looks away, then runs a hand through his hair.]
O-Okay, uh. Y-You... know me. R...Right?
[Commentlog]
Mm. We met a few weeks ago.
[She looks from his face to his leg and back again, caught between concern and confusion.]
[Commentlog]
But she remembers only a few weeks.
This cannot be her.
This cannot be the Kairi he knew.]
I...
I-I think... you m-met a d...different me.
[Commentlog]
So, you know about other worlds and... other selves?
[She hesitated to call Namine a nobody. How could she disregard another part of herself?]
[Commentlog]
Xanth finally looks back up at her and, hesitantly, he nods.]
Y...Yeah.
A-And I think... I... kn-knew a--
[His voice cracks and he swallows past the lump in his throat.]
A d...different y-y--you.
[Commentlog]
[What can she possibly say? Namine had asserted herself before, had reappeared when she needed to. But Kairi didn't know when it was going to happen or how to trigger it or even if it was still possible. But he sounded so hurt.]
I'm sorry. I wish I could help. But, well... I don't remember and she... Isn't here.
[Commentlog]
It-- i-it-- don't worry. I-It's... n-not your fault.
[But gods, does it hurt. Xanth scrubs at his eyes. He can't cry, not here, not now. Not in front of Kairi, not in front of this stranger.
But he can't stop.]
[Commentlog]
[She catches sight of him rubbing his eyes and without though, shifts closer to him. But what is she supposed to do? If she knew his other, then is this Xanth a stranger? And how did he know her name and what she looked like if it was Namine he met? So many things don't add up. But seeing him hurt and filthy and crying and looking so much like the person that she was getting to know, Kairi brushes it all aside. She throws an arm around his shoulder in an awkward sideways hug. It's an uncomfortable gesture by all accounts but there's nothing else she can think to do.]
What happened to you?
[Commentlog]
And yet, in the same motion, she is so far.
Xanth's shoulders shudder under Kairi's arms as he fights a sob. Should he tell her what happened? About the battle with The End, about the Golden Shore? Would she even believe him?
He sniffles, then draws his knees up to his chest and hugs them close. His entire body aches, but the position makes him feel so much safer.]
It-- it's-- a long, l--long s-story...
[Commentlog]
[It's not funny, not really. Kairi retracts her arm by tries to catch Xanth's eye.]
But you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. C'mon. I can show you where the infirmary is.
[Commentlog]
But he just can't talk about it yet. The wound, still fresh, has been struck again and had salt rubbed into it. What he needs is time.
He sniffs again and nods, wiping his face on his rag of a sleeve.]
Th-th--thanks. I-- I-I'm-- I... I'm s-sorry...
[Commentlog]
What for?
[Commentlog]
F-For... fa--falling ap-part, l-like... like this...
[If only he could hold his fucking composure for once in his life, at least until he's alone.]
[Commentlog]
[To tell the truth, she was more relieved that the hug now had an explanation... Sort of. It wasn't okay, really. But then he'd been pretty scared the first time they'd had a conversation like this too...
Maybe soup would make it better, or at least something to take his mind off it.
Setting the fishing pole down on the shore - she'll come back for it - Kairi started heading back toward the gate.]
So, there're some things you should know about here.
[Commentlog]
He's heard about harsh punishments and something about tattoos, but rather than interrupt, he'll let Kairi explain.]
Y--Yeah?
[He's not sure he could talk for long without starting to cry again anyway.]
[Commentlog]
[Best to cover old bases first.]
They, heh, must really want us to write.
[Commentlog]
[But Xanth makes a mental note of this. Better to prepare himself for something strange than throw a fit when it happened.]
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